Part of the first few days of finding out Kris had a match, I was elated, yet nervous and scared. If you do some research on the path of transplant, you can only understand what a parent would go through. In all good intentions I walked around with the biggest smile, yet butterflies fluttered around in my belly.
On Friday I scurried around with plans to head to City Of Hope to take referral paperwork, and meet with our transplant nurse coordinators. To give paperwork, and more love.
Receiving a call while on the road stating his transplant was already in the works and dates were being laid out-
I would soon land at my friend Beth's home. She's tucked away above PCH with a view to melt your eyes. Exactly what I needed. I needed her soothing blankie over my shoulders. She's a 6 year transplant survivor. She was diagnosed with AML at 48. We met on the soccer field 4 years ago. There was me, the Varsity Rep. handing out papers, soliciting emails, field notes, and pretty much just soccer mama stuff. I was never good with "stats"- but I thrived sharing love, and goodness from each field, or game. One day sitting next to her complimenting her beautiful short hair. To soon sit shot gun next to her sharing her story.
Little did I know that one day I would be pulling up to her house wanting to rush in, sit down and just talk. And cry. And pry. Anything and everything I can about "transplant". And the shitty trials of cancer. And the really fucked up things that happen with chemo. And the chemical process that slowly took my boy down like a thumb in a thumb wrestle battle. She gets me. She gets all of it. She lets me talk, and ask a trillion questions. She. Doesn't. Care. She listens, encourages me. Her husband Mike doing the same. Hearing it from his side. The caretaker. The lover. The husband. The many days, hours, minutes and torture moments watching his wife take on new marrow to learn to live, walk, grow....
They get this. She's the first one I think of when I have a new concern. She's my first text with something new. She's my mentor and she probably never in a million years knew she'd be...
Bill starting texting me that evening.."hun, where are you"-
Me stating where, and I'd be home soon. That soon wore on for another almost 2 hours. I arrived, he was starving...and concerned. Knowing I was overwhelmed, and just needed a shoulder.
He poured me wine. And we talked. I made an omelet for our dinner and we'd call it a night.
The next morning he said..."Let's go have lunch in HB"-
He drove me down PCH. Pulling into Dog Beach. I'm thinking....hmmm what the heck. Dog beach?
As we exit, I'm in boots. It's almost 80 degrees. He asks for my help to open lid of truck.
He had an entire picnic set and waiting to carry to a bench we'd always talked about sitting at.
Our uber good bottle of wine in tow, various amazing cheese, flowers, water in a vase. (He bought and packed the truck the night before as I was with Beth and Mike)
Here. Would you look at this you guys....xo
He say's LET'S CELEBRATE MAMA! Our boy is gonna get through this!
The bind in our love isn't just lust. Or the plain organic start of a budding friendship. What happens after time in life is relationships go through trials. They go through crisis. They go through excitement. Good times traveling to amazing places, raising our glasses with friends. They go through heartache saying goodbye to a parent, or friends. They go through milestones of sending your little girl off to college. They go through happy times loading the truck lake bound. They dance together at concerts. They yell at eachother over silly yet meaning full things. They hug and cry together. They laugh hard together. They sleep together and they sleep apart. They are strong for eachother when the world is pushing like the tides. They sit and stare at eachother over decisions their kids make. One not agreeing with the other. They stand at the side of a hospital bed adjusting a blanket because they are nervous. They switch places because a business needs attention, but a child needs a parent bedside fighting for their life. They wake morning after morning realizing this bad dream isn't a bad dream but one worth fighting THROUGH. They open their best bottle of wine, and sip it nibbling on cheese hugging eachothers legs and smiling with some laughter how funny it was to drink red wine at noon. They get eachother. Through it all. My best friend. My soulmate. My everything.
He is.
Bill, thank you for making that Saturday extra sweet. You fill my hardest days with hope.
I've never felt secure, in all my life. Sitting next to you in this life makes it worthy-
Let's do this. Ready to put on our warrior boots?
Come on baby....."Two Sparrows in a hurricane"
I love you.
This Warrior Mama Lisa
ps- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TREVOR! The most kindest guy with the best laugh in the world! Love you! Hope you are enjoying those rocky mountains!
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