Check. One two. Check.

Welllllll

Hellooooo there kids! 

It's been a hot minute since I checked-in with you.....

Tuning back in from last week with several topics to cover.  All of which really deserve their own time. Therefore, I'll try to give you the quickest run down in history- ya right.

First and foremost....my son....my strong birdie.

Last Thursday he and Jen took their "hopeful" last final journey to and from City Of Hope.  A place that will always, always be a part of him.  A part of them.  A part of me.  A huge part to our entire family.  

He did his normal routine of labs, doc and last final request to have his "port" removed.  Those wires that took turns supplying medicine, and stem cells into him.  Removed like no big deal, he'd record and off they'd go. 

Medicines still ruling him. And us.  It will be an everyday reminder of what science, hope and love is. 

Last week when they made their trek to and from City Of Hope I was a tad bit confused.  I guess when you navigate through the medical side, taking away the love and nurturing that only a Mom would understand you'd get it.  Other than that I realized that there's two young adults growing up.  And navigating through and out of the most jacked up thing a couple would go through. I wasn't invited.  And later realized...maybe it's all part of the plan. 

Maybe Lisa they want to grow up and away from all of this.  Not in a bad way...

Truth.

Insert crybaby freak- me.

My mom was due to land by jet aerooooooplane in the lbz on Thursday afternoon for a weekend visit for my Grandma's 85th Birthday.  Bill was leaving town for Desert Storm ( A boating poker run, reunion of friends, boats and life out at the lake)- 

Kali was headed to Stagecoach (A desert concert that goes on for 3 days) with her friends, and most importantly....mine.  

My fridge was empty with the exception of lemonade, 3 eggs, tortilla's...and some beef jerky on my kitchen table. 

Since Kris has been gone, le' fridge is suffering.  Sorry Mom.....I do cook.

My mom is rad that way.  She just said "no bigs Lee..."-  When inside I wonder if she thinks I don't have my shit together.  I brought her to work with me on Friday, along with little grocery runs to grab this and that..but only enough to just get by.  We wouldn't be home. Our Friday afternoon and night landed us in West Covina for my Grandma's surprise party. 

At the VFW Hall.  Mad respect for this place. 

We took on that VFW Hall like a respectful trip to Disneyland.  A place where a good stiff drink is served, and you'd most guarantee some dirty looks our way due to the fact that our tribe took over.  From 3 years to 85- 

We'd dance, sing, holler in pure party fashion.  I couldn't help but watch the glares and stares our way.

But ain't no party like the way we party.  Celebrating eighty five years of the leader of the pack.

Out. Of. Our. Way.  

Boom.

Plus, it's life.

You know...life. As one lady shook her booty over to us, named Lois.  Her birthday too.  Her hair coifed to the perfect two toned, t.  Her exact words to myself, my aunt Lynda and my sister...

"If you aren't having a good time, that's your fault"-  

Think about that.  Eighty six years old, gathered with friends every Friday night at your local pub, with music and a dance floor.  Not to mention the drinks they poured.  bam.   Her outfit, jewels, lipstick and makeup made to perfection.  We'd chit chat back and forth as Elvis blared in the background and she'd sing along with a voice to take the place down. Asking us if we had children.  Of course you beam as you say "yup two"- Asking her....a reply that made me want to spit my dirty martini out of my lips. 

"I tried that once, and decided I didn't like it"-  Laughing as she pounded on my knee.  HAHAHA.

She has one daughter.  Whom she adores. 

And so...Lois.   

We can all thank her for the honesty and most important, her zest for life.  We all know that in eighty six years she's been handed shit in a basket.  She did mention she lost the love her life a few years ago.  He was 13 years her senior, dying at 97. That was her 3rd husband. 

Oh, Lois.

So....where were we?   If you can tell, I'm trying to get back in the rhythm of life. I'm trying extremely hard to trust my faith.  And God.  And with my daily devotional book I actually look forward to reading, I am faithful and trusting that He has a plan.  And that Kris is gonna be okay.  

Stomach issues still tackle him down like a rascal but he's fighting through.  Even when at times I can tell he'd like to curl in a ball and stay there.  He moves on.

Okay.....  Last week his counts were good.  His weight was kind of what we expected...

But....counts. 

April 28th 

WBC 4.5

RBC 3.16

Hemoglobin 28.3 (you can see his color coming back on his face)

Platelets 122

He posted a video on his instagram account of the removal of that port. If you have instagram, you can see it there- I could hardly watch it, but man worth sitting through.  I still think he's the bravest bird in the world.  Mad respect for his spirit through such a shitty card hand.  His instagram is captain_kris.  

Side Note:

By Thursday afternoon with all the feelzz and emotions drifting through my veins, it's no joke at how sappy I was.  I cried so much last week.  Looking back in my emotional rear view mirror...I know why.  When I pulled up to the airport to pick up my Mom I watched her wave at us, with her back pack on her back...and I thought..wow.  

There she is.  

I haven't seen my Mom since Kali's graduation.  

Anyway........

Here's a sneak peek at the weekend. 

 Friday evening.  The littlest, listening to the eldest.  The pattern in life doesn't change.  We all move forward. 

Loving, living and learning.

My Grandma surrounded by 6 of her 7 kids.  We have one angel in Heaven. Arlene....she's greatly missed. 

That was one fun and wild spirited aunt.  Always had a huge smile.  A light above her head to light up a room.

Happy Birthday Grandma!  85 looks so good on you...even though you despise pictures. I feel ya, I'm getting that feeling myself. 

Saturday morning my sister would swoop us up for a breakfast down in LB.  

Our one and only shot. 

My friends, co-workers, sisters-in-not-law-but-love, neighbors...you name it, always ask the same question...where's your mom? Who does she look like...andonandonandonandon. 

And excuse this shot of my Grandma in her nighty, but this my friends....is everything.  Her first Great-Grandson...thankyouverymuchlisayouteenmom-    That party the night before tossed her for some exhaustion, but she was elated to see my boy. 

And pictured here is a makeupless Lisa, standing in the one living room in the town of La Puente that has never changed.  Those bricks.  That smell of good food, and that cookie bin that used to sit up high in her kitchen.  This home you guys....this home. 

I actually cried too much last week.  

NO MORE TEARS LISA!  It's all good!

And while I was boo-hooing and enjoying just the aroma of my Mom next to me (she wears jazmine oil)-

And sucking up the moments with our aunts.  And uncle. And little grom cousins.  And my son.  And Jen who radiates when she looks at Kris.  And we played Cards Against Humanity...LOL!

And to hear my God-Mother Cece say fucker, was probably the best thing ever. 

And so....

I present to you....

Kali's weekend-  

A weekend full of apple-juice and pinata's.    

Or I mean, cowboy boots. And hats.

Or bubbles....

Thank you Shell, Maria and Roxanne for taking such good care of my girl.  You seriously are part of what has kept my beating heart working.  The love you give me and her is unbreakable.  And I love you all.

I was sweating her driving from San Marcos direct to Palm Springs.  And if you think I'm a freak, I am. 

Just wait until your littles aren't little and they start driving, and going and doing.  Just wait. 

But first....

Let's talk about our new schedule. 

Kris no longer goes to City Of Hope, God willing. 

He has started his appointments at Kaiser in Hollywood.  A dirty filthy town, but filled with the best doctors and nurses in all the land.  As we parked in this structure and walked 150 miles jk to our destination I thought....man...what a change.  

You know me....creature of habit.  CREATURE OF HABIT. 

I guess in my own way, I miss Duarte.  I miss pulling in to that place and walking by that fountain.  Whether it was walking next to our boy, or pushing a wheelchair.  It will ALWAYS hold a dear place in the corner of my heart.  

Good news here kids is he now goes every other week.  Counts allowing.  He'll do labs local-And docs every other week. 

Counts- 

WBC 6.4

RBC 3.65

Hemoglobin 11.3

Platelets 191

He's lost a few pounds.  But....let's just look at the horizon. Let's look at his future.  

His stomach is tore up.  

We requested a new oral chemo. One of which I believe might just be the wrong decision.

A decision that I made by a gut feeling.  Gleevec-

It is a gateway oral chemo for Sprycel.  One that we thought was causing the severe nausea.  And of course the given taste bud drama.  He dry heaves every.single.morning.  Some things just don't taste the same.

As his doctor says.  Either one, he has to pick.  He has to have an inhibitor in his blood stream.  We can't allow that muted gene 9/22 to scramble up.  Being Philadelphia Chromosome positive allows for crazy things to happen.  And come back.   And so....a decision must be made.  Like today. Or in our pharmacy dramatic scenario, tomorrow....because they.don't.have.it.in.stock.  SHOCKER.  Fucking shocker.

For now, we look at the glory.  Of where he is.  Of the one hundred and eight days of one heck of a journey.

One Hundred and Eight Days. From yesterday to hear his doctor say to us, "Dude you look good"-

Yes, dude, you look good.

I still lean on my Bone Marrow Transplant Survivor page to help me walk through the shadow of doubt.  

Something that creeps up on me in the dark like a monster. 

I still pray. 

Hard. 

And I will continue to pray for the rest of my days here.  

Let's do this! 

Gonna try to shed the sadness on here. The next chapter of a good summer.  Hopefully I will get to a point where sleep isn't interrupted thinking the worst.  

I want to see him laugh, and go and fish and swim, and do his thing. 

He deserves it. 

Hope all my Desert Storm friends had a blast!  I missed my lover so so much.  

I missed all of you guys there....Hi Rosa! Hi Carol!  I missed your sweet hugs. 

I missed the sound of those big motors.  

I missed the smiles from a reunion of friends.

I missed our sunset cheers, and kisses by the moonlight.

I missed our chocolate covered cherry martini nights.  Where one turned into 3.  ugh. 

As always that wind and rain does its thing....but nothing better than receiving my love back home with big hugs and lots of besos.

Have a great Tuesday night you guys....

I've missed you.  

This Mama Lisa

--------------->  as she sets down her warrior stick. 

Time to live!

And navigate through medical receipts-

(This is 1/4 of what we've received thus far)