Recognition

In these moments of despair, and a family crisis I am amazed at the strength.  From us.

From him.  For me. For the kids. 

A few things I want to tell the world about this man. 

He walked into my life as 3.  Two young kids that were in need of guidance. Love.  Trust.  And dedication.

The last two months I have barked, cried and shriveled up into a ball over this. 

Like the other day when he brought me my favorite sandwich, but forgot chips. 

Then the next time he brought the favorite sandwich WITH chips, but brought PLAIN BAKED LAYS. ew.

After my little snippy lips let loose, I apologized later letting him know I was an asshole.

Or how he turns the air dial up when I'm hot. From 7 to 5.   And 7 is the coldest of coldest, and right now, I want to freeze at night and rely on my blankets.  Not 5, to kick covers off. So the next morning I make my comments, and he sits in silence understanding me.  Again, later knowing I am just an asshole.  But he smiles and soon we laugh about it. 

Or how about reminding me about the little things at work that need to be tweeked, and yet all I can think of is Kris.  

We walk the walk together. He sees me weep, so he holds me closer.  

He checks on the kids when I am overwhelmed with just trying to make life work, at work. 

He lets me go to SuperMex to get green rice and a margarita just because he knows it makes my world a better place.

He has sat up with me at 3am in the living room, as I lay my head on his shoulder asking "why"-

He asks the doctor questions when my lips freeze because sometimes I want to say so much, but my lip quivers. 

He goes with me back and forth to drop food off to Kris. Whatever and whenever.  He never peeps a word. 

He knows that I am a mama bird, and loves me more for it. 

I've always taken care of everyone.  He stands back, because he knows it's my only way.  Really the only way I ever knew.

He held my head last month and promised me we will get through this. No matter what. 

He lets me drive because I am a back seat driver.  eh em, he tailgates and drives too fast.  

Kris will kill me when he sees this picture, but it makes me smile. Although it kills me to know leukemia was somehow sprouting in our boy. 

Bill is my soul mate.  We found eachother at a crazy time, and have walked some paths that would blow some people down. 

We become stronger.  We say every morning as we hug, "Lets do this baby, we can do this"-

He's the king of programming all things around the house.  You want a nightlight to blast on as you walk by? Call Bill. 

He's methodical.  And I love every bit of him.  Even when he rinses out his coffee mug and leaves it on top of the sink instead of inside.  Or you know, that tap of the shaver into the sink leaving stubbies.  It's okay.  

Because I am quite sure he's tangled in my hair every.single.day.  In your toes, right Bill?

Huge shout out to you lover. My rock.  My soul mate.  

You have filled my heart to the top.  And for that I am grateful.  Kris and Kali are lucky mama is loved, by you.

"Let's do this honey"-  One day at a time.  Until our handsome birdie is up and at em' again.

Happy Friday Fellers.

Play hard, and don't sit on the bench.  

Love to you,

This Warrior Mama Lisa