Ice Machine Professional.

A few years ago when Bill broke his femur we were sent home with this amazing machine.  You put ice in it, (well in our case, I put two frozen thingamiggers that go into your ice chest) and it wraps around his leg and circulates very cold water. 

The morning of his surgery after dropping him off curbside at 5:30am, I had planned to have a mammogram the same morning (8:30am) so I could be close to him in a strange silly way.  Well, from 5:30am to 8:30am and a very restless sleepless night I thought..."go back home and stick to what you're familiar with....home and safety".   That's just what I did. 

Covid Hospital Drop 5:30am.  Strange times kids, strange times. 

My homemade living room nursing station. 

I received a text from Kaiser around 6:15am stating I was on the update text list.  Whew, I thought...here we go. Game on.  By 9:30 I hadn't heard anything so I started doing what Lisa does best, and dug deep into the phone numbers I have on file for that good ol' Kaiser Resort.  After finding my way to a nurse in the surgery center she told me he'd been in since 7:16am.  Cool.  And so I'd wait some more.

By almost 1 his doctor called.  They were still closing him up but very happy with what they went in to accomplish.  Not really wanting him to stay, because of covidjovid, they had no other choice because of the extensive time he was under, along with the small complications that could arise. 

A couple hours later a nurse would call that had him in recovery offering to let me speak with him.

LOL!  His raspy voice and silly antics told me the drugs had a good firm hold on him, and all was good in the hood there in his little recovery room.

I went out to our garage getting a shower chair (a metal chair with flames we had in our showroom, small enough, safe enough and just the fitting style for my rebel)  He's had enough surgerys to know what works and won't work. A shower chair and poop help chair were a big fat no bueno for him. 

I carried the ice machine in.  Washed the chair down with bleach. Carried all our rugs in the entire house to our big tub to store.  

And waited. 

I was able to get him home the next day.  With his walker. 

A walker we've named Willy.  Willy the walker is loud.  Willy the walker kicks ass --, but also sends a signal to this mama of "hmmwhatishedoingnow" mode. 

It's been a week and two days and this rockstar is doing awesome! Finally off all his pain pills.  Only a strong aspirin for clot prevention. A couple tylenols here and there...and PT comes twice a week to get him stretched out.  His cut is from middle of his booty (what booty.lol) down to his knee.  Glued together, and sewn on the inside.  

Healing guys! HEALING.

He's a little different emotionally.  I can see a distance in his eyes. 

Often wondering what is going through his mind.  New hardware in his body.  

A new start for something he put off for so long.  For many reasons.  It's done.

So we hope for acceptance.  We hope his body receives this 3rd chance to level up.  (They tried to give him back 1 1/2 inches of length, but they can see 1inch.  Which is just rad!)

I bought him his first pair of regular flip flops without an extension on em to see how they will feel. 

I've taken pictures of him each day. 

A journal of sorts to look back on.

Kind of like my blog and the things that have come and gone in our life.

People. Friends. Family. Work.  Colleagues. Life. 

Life moves on. 

Healing is our subject. 

There is this season in our life right now.  A season to give love in ways we knew were there, but lose sight when focused on other topics.  A season to long for the end of this summer.  To soak up Fall and the goodness that comes with these new chapters. 

New beginnings.  Old friends, new friends.  

Enjoyed my bestie gathering. Celebrating Susie, and celebrating just being together.  So many things fractured in this pandemic. Politics shouting differences.  Masks hiding real smiles.  Fear lingering on our shoulders.  Humans learning this new way.  Some going with the grain, while others question the agenda. 

Sickness has passed by us, and yet daily you wonder what a tickle is in your throat versus just an allergy to the flowers you watered.  Or the lawn you cut.  

Waking at night in awe of the changes that happened to the word "Family", and yet embracing the beauty of those that come together during the hard times. 

Realizing your true friends that sit by your side during the fucked up moments, and yet looking back at the phony ones claimed as "family" that knew along a knife would eventually come out. 

It's all still enlightening to me. 

I've accepted this year 2020 as a rugged one.  One with a strange beginning yet so hopeful for a better ending.  

I'll always lean towards  HOPE.  

I've witnessed it come in slow, warm loving ways.

And I've learned that having FAITH helps more than I ever knew could. 

Happy Birthday Susie! 

For now I continue to rotate the ice machine ice thinggamiggers.  I prep food from my heart.  I drive him to and from.  I water lawns like a bandit.  I'm preparing good changes for Kris.  For us.  

I am proud of my strength.  My heart.  And most of all...Willy The Walker.

It's times like these I learn from my own past.  I learn that step by step, hour by hour you can do it. 

With friends.

With love.

And with Walker Involved Hugs.  Big big hugs. 

And wine. 

Kim Crawford Sauvignon blanc. To be exact.  Good lawrd.  You save me girl. 

Cheers to you all....

Be thankful for your home.  For your breath. For your body. 

Some are fighting to keep theirs alive.

I'll take nursing my handsome HIPSTER back to health over and over again.

Did I mention he's on a walker for 6 more weeks?

WOMP WOMP.

Don't stop git git !!! 

Love,

This Mama Lisa 

Pro Walker Slinger Into Trunk. Pro Ice Machine Filler.  Pro Meal Prepper.  Pro love giver. Pro Tell Him We Need To Change That Shirt Cuz Old Man Smell Is a Real Thing. 

Pro Back Ache Complainer.

So grateful for the life we have. 

Peace out!

Saddle Up.

For the last couple of months we've been preparing for July 28th.

A day for a new beginning.  

A chance for courage.

A chance for not giving up a work day.

A work day would jump in front of pain for him.  Remember he is the hardest working guy, hence the reason he'd never schedule this surgery. 

It's time. 

Add in this pandemic circus. And I've had some freak out moments.

Dropping the love of my life off for a huge complicated surgery case?  I mean, come on. 

Tomorrow. 

A plan to drop my dude off at the hospital entrance at 5:30am. 

Discussions we've had all along.  

About fears.

About love.

About courage. 

About time. 

About strength. 

About frustrations.

About surgeons we like. 

And about the what-if's and my silly antics. Like wanting to sneak in with nursing clothes on. jk. LOL!

If you are the praying type of human, please pray for him. 

If you are a juju tosser into the good ol' atmosphere...toss some up for him.

If you are a cheers wine clinkin' martini slingin human, clink one for him. I am too, so fair game. Have two for me. 

Pray for my strength as I tend to over mother him at times. 

Got my boots strapped in.  My mama warrior hat on.  And the love of my life wrapped in and around my heart until he's back home. 

I did book my mammogram for tomorrow at that same darn hospital, so I WILL be there anyway...so that's my weirdness and loophole to just hang around a lil' bit longer.... #freak

Much love you lovers.

Wash your hands and text Bill if you have his digits!  He'll need all the love and healing you got in yo little souls! Don't be surprised if he doesn't reply, just know he'll eventually read em.  LOVE. 

And if you wonder what I'll be doing while he's getting his Hip Hip Hooray surgery?

Oh, probably walking in circles around our house but swimming in GRACE. And lots of prayer. 

From this bravery, just like the other chapters, we'll come out stronger.  

Courage is a booger until you're in it to win it.  And we will win it!

Can I get a HIP HIP HOORAY! <---------see what I did there. LOL

Peace out.

This Mama Lisa 

Until I can't any more, I will take care of you and love you with all I have. 

Laughing At Two Thousand Twenty.

2020 LOL- Yo what's up cool cats?!

Thriving?  Surviving?

Slowly dying?

I guess we are anyway...right?

That's for damn sure.

What started out as a new chapter for us has been chapter(s) filled with goodness, fear, laughter, tears and excitement. 

From learning what masks feel most comfy, to walking through stores with my silly laughter just staring at all the fellow mask wearers.  

Always wondering what it would be like if you were dropped down in the middle of July 2020 from exactly a year ago.

But isn't that what and how life works?  One minute you're planning a new adventure in the future, and one shift and it all comes crumbling down.  I imagine the girls planning their weddings. Or a new baby on the way and only one person allowed.  OR to really spice things up in the fear department, imagine jumping into the ring of the fight for your life.  Alone. 

Insane. 

I'm sure you all have some of the same moments.  Like me, maybe some days of certainty.  While others just straight out fear?

I've tried to remain super optimistic, even though my plate is once again overfloweth. 

Nothing I can't handle.  And nothing my strength and faith can't pull me through. 

Although 2am, my body acts like world war 4 is about to start. 

So....where do we start?

Take it back to Fathers Day?  mmmk Here's my handsome dudes.  A quick trip from Newport to the island for lunch.  Kris' good friend Austin and his papa.  

Made for a nice day for them....

We jaunted back to Havasu for a few weeks....and then back again. 

Bill booked my favorite hotel for my 50th- Monarch Beach Resort back in April but a reschedule for covidbovid happened.

So July it was!

Masked up!

 Daaayyummmm

 Smokin hottie! 

A weekend alone to remember....so much fun together! 

(Birthday celebration with my besties)

We drifted back in time for Bill's Orthopedic appointment.  And appointment he's put off for years and YEARS.  He's finally ready and has been in so much pain for years with his hip.  

A date set. 

Getting it fixed. 

Along with his femur rod that has been really really hurting him...

The closer the date gets, the more anxious we're becoming.  I can't go advocate for him.  I have to drop him off and wait for the surgeon to call me to tell me he's okay.

A new chapter. 

A new chance. 

A walker ready.  An all too familiar system we'll navigate through.  We'll flip the pages like we've always done.

Kris is moving to Havasu himself.  All of this happening in the next month. 

Don't blink.....

So much. SO MUCH to wade through.

I keep telling myself, over and over again....we'll get to the other side.  Hopefully his pain will decrease. 

Hopefully they'll give him some length on a side that has since I've known him, hurts.

From shoes with extensions on em, to moving around in every day life.

It's time. 

So on Tuesday if you're the praying type, or one that meditates for good juju.  Think of my handsome. 

I'm sure I'll be a nutty nut, but hopeful.  It's my word.

I've been cleaning out cupboards for a big move and the trend on many of my mugs that I gathered shortly before donating them had the same words written on each. 

Faith. 

Love. 

Prayer. 

I was reading a trend in that cupboard.

Crosses adorn my walls with FAITH scribbled on the side. 

As they say, when one chapter closes, you keep flipping for the new one. 

What Bill and I have built together is a team.  A bond of strength.  

And he'll be up and at em sooner than later!

So three cheers for Bill-- HIP HIP HOORAY... !!  Feeling alive again is tremendous for his soul.  Being restrained for so many years in pain, in less mobility and in full work mode busting butt for his future.  

It's time.

Get behind me kids.  Let's sip good wine.  Hug tight. And share smiles.  Hopefully folks can see that smile in your eyes with your masks on...

Never EVER stop spreading compliments-

This world needs them more than ever. 

With sweaty palms, tears in my eyes some moments, but lots of HOPE in my heart.

It's what I was made for. 

And with that, we'll talk later?

Wash your hands.

In My Life

This Mama Lisa

Lord, please protect my love, my partner for life and soul mate on this Earth. May they have the wisdom to fix him.  

And one for the road....Oh my sweet Kali....

Mic Check.

Well hello you little sugars!

How ya doin this month so far?

Getting used to le' masks or battling the control over it all...?

I sway back and forth.  I've been navigating scary viruses for many years now, and on top of being a germaphobe I can't understand the whole mask thing.  Especially while driving in a car.  I just don't get it. 

I like my freedom.  It's true, it does protect others if you're carrying the virus, but if you're in your car alone...stop. 

ANYWAY....

That's my opinion and my thoughts are pretty deep on this whole 2020.  What a fucking year it's been. 

2020--Am I right?

May was a beautiful month celebrating our bebe birdie Kali.  Along with my bestie. June came along and we landed into another birthday for another bestie Rox, my dad and my aunt Ronda.  

I've been purging things.  Sorting pictures.  Is it just me or do you find yourself challenged with keeping heirlooms that we think will mean something to the kids later, but find out that she/he doesn't care about their Kindergarten graduation cover. I've sat sorting through oodles and oodles of old pictures.  Pictures of my early 20's.  Pictures of people that have left this Earth.  I've stared at my mother in law "Bom", a woman that loved me and took me in at the ripe age of 17.  She's gone from this Earth now and so many times I wish I could share with her all that's gone on with her prize grandson.  I wish I could pick up the phone and talk to some of those that have passed on.  It's the reality of what we should have done back when we were supposed to, but "didn't find the time".  

Sure I was working hard, taking care of my birdies, traveling around in soccer clubs and doing all I could to donate myself for my birdies.  

And yet the regret. 

The other morning as I was waking up and sorting this new life and what lies ahead I realized that the last 15 years or so I have been a walking zombie.  A tad bit numb, if you will. 

Crazy. 

I told Bill that I wonder if those elders around me worry about the things we worry about in our 40's and 50's.  

This life is a constant juggle of happy, sad, scared and anxiety.  

Best friends, lovers and wine surely help but the reality of life is treacherous waters.  It's like a calm sea one moment to find yourself wading in huge waves. 

Add in this stupid virus.  Riots (assholes) and looting (bigger assholes) and you find yourself on the brink of a breakdown. 

I share with you our month of May.  And some of June. 

Grateful for all we've worked for.  Grateful for a partner that gets me.  I get him.  I stare across at him at some of the most simple days and nights and am forever filled with gratitude that we get this chance to love one another.  

In the midst of all the bullshiz that he navigated through this last year, we're forever lucky to have best friends.  The six pack.  The family that we do have. And two of the best kids we've been able to love. 

Without further adieu, here's May!

 I love you.  Not just to the moon and back.  It's beyond that.  Hardest working man I know.  In more ways than business, you take such good care of everything you created.  

 I love my best friends. Happy Birthday Maria! 

 First drinks in a restaurant - 320 Seal Beach May 2020- Worth noting.  Kick ass too! 

Morning walks lake side....

 The Office 

 Most handsome man in all the land. 

 Fox's Parker 2020

 Back to my juice bar in Seal Beach 

Our front entry- Little did we know the memories we'd make.....

And one for the road....

 My sister said it best.  He was and is the sweetest of souls.  Excuse me while I dig on through box and after box of memories.  Incredible.  Quietly, peacefully accepting all a mother endures.  What she offers. What she messed up. What she tried.  What worked. What didn't work. 

Memories. 

Letting go and purging all the memories that serve no further purpose. 

Cleanse. 

Let them go.  

Make new ones. 

Don't look back. 

Just love those that you need to. 

Smile at a stranger. Even with your silly mask on.  They can see your eyes.  

Thank a server.  Thank an officer.  

Keep on keepin on. 

Stay away from the ugly folks.  They're out there. Trust me.  I've smelt that sauce a long time ago.  Just takes a while for the colors to show.  Eventually they do.  

Peace!

This Mama Lisa