The first of seven.

Today is my Mom's Birthday.

And I only have pictures from 3 years ago. 

But that's ok.  I have memories.  I have my life.  She has hers.  She is happy doing what she does, with the man I call Dad.  She is the oldest of 7 kiddos.  All girls and one boy.  Mom, I hope this cool October day is just what you deserve.  I hope that Dad takes you out to lunch or dinner to your favorite little spot.  I believe there are two in that town.  One Mexican. One Chinese.  They love it.   Or Costco, where my Dad obsesses over Scallops and Crab. 

All weekend the thought of her birthday stirred in my head.  What do I buy?  The perfect...something.  Again.  What color does she like? Does she need running clothes? Does she even run anymore?  Does she like pink? Purple? Natural light brown?  Hmmmm maybe she'd like this Gardenia Candle.  Or maybe this body wash?  And ohh shoot, I didn't mail it in time. #again. Instead, I continued to put it off, as the weekend went by. Passing each opportunity.  Don't know why.  Sometimes I think these things happen naturally.  Or maybe it was an epic fail.  Annnnnwaaayyyyy.....I sat down and wrote.  I wrote my Mom a letter, and stuffed it with dough.  Uh oh you might say, think, laugh about.  Me too. Because it was deep. Way deep.  And I went there....with many things I haven't spoke to her about.  Face to face, phone, or letter.  Ever.  I forgave her for the distant Mom she is. And that it is okay, although sometimes I feel the opposite.  I expressed how much I miss her.  And have always needed her in my life.  But it's for a good reason, I don't.  As I say, things happen for a reason.  It wasn't all sad kids, It was good.  I thanked her for the many laughs we had.  She was almost like a sister to T and I.  She went through alot with us.  I remembered one time in the laundry mat, (we went every dog-gone Friday afternoon. Jealous?)  And someone proceeded to take our stuff out of the washer while we were gone getting something from Lucky's (grocery store) and just tossed it in a corner counter.  I proceeded to handle the situation, and as I have always been, led this situation into hysteria. Not all bad though.  Just had to set something straight.   There were more funny times in our big ol' junky car that she'd hit these railroad tracks in the OC so fast that we'd fly up and hit our little heads on the car ceiling.  Seat belts? Wha? nah.  What were those.  There were times when we'd travel to our Grandma's in that said junkie car from Riverside, and it. would. always. overheat.  So she carried a gallon of water.  And I would almost always have to pee my pants from fear.  That shiz scared me.  She was brave.  She is an amazing cook.  Every day as we'd walk in from school, she'd always have and "afternoon snack". She stood by our Dad. She stood by us.  Well, eh em until Chapter 17.  But that's ok.  She is a good woman.  She gave me life.  She gave my sister life.  She is a good woman to my Dad. She loves her home, her property, her garden, her Dog and Cats.  She is happy.  I love you Mom. Happy Birthday.  She's the one that always told Tina and I, never leave the house without looking presentable.   Never.  And always respect people.  Happy Tuesday Rockstars!  If you have a Mom, tell her you love her.  Like today.  There might not be a tomorrow.  And you don't want to leave this Earth, without saying it...just one more time.