Peace & Love: There's Always Next Year

We planned a trip to Tahoe to watch Kali compete in her first Triathlon. We had to cancel.

I kept telling myself, it's okay Lisa, there's next year. God willing, I will be there.

Her dad will be there.

Was a heartbreaker to have her that close to my parents. And to miss it all.

Thanking all my sweet stars that my best friend Shelley went in lieu of her mama.

This isn't her first time. (She chaperoned 5 girls when Kris landed in the hospital for a week)

On Saturday morning I woke early to try to catch Kali before she jumped into the brisk waters of Tahoe for her 500mtr swim. I missed her.

Soon I received a picture from Shelley. Kali taking off her wetsuit, to jump on the bike.

Guess what?

I cried. #shocker

More pity party on my side than anything-
The wonder of should I have went, or is my heart decision to stick with Bill my soul mate a better choice. He's stood by me in the hardest time of my life.

There's always next year.

Grant did the Triathlon last year. This year their family would compete as a team. Craig (Grant's dad) had colon cancer removed a few months ago. A diagnosis that took place weeks before the kids graduated. A nightmare, if you will. And so in true Rapoza style...the one and only way to get-back-up in the game of life, is to move on. And move on they did! All 5 of them. Competing up high in the hills of Lake Tahoe. We had to cancel our trip last minute per Bill's request. Those words were harder to roll from his mouth, than for me to digest. This is life.

Again, we've been to hell and back and most likely in my wicked negative mind, probably back through hell again.

The beauty of this life is -- Good Friends.

It's having a daughter that is strong enough to compete. It's having a daughters boyfriends' family that love Kali as one of their own.

It's the love from my best friend and my MOM, whom never showed interest in things we'd desire as young girls. She thrives on watching Kali compete in anything--now....

It's this life that shifts. It hurts. It shocks. And is beautiful, and then awful.

It's moving through what you know is good and right.

Shelley, thank you. Mom, thank you for your banners!

Rapoza's....you are one heck of a family to Kali. The bond of strength, and community. You prove that hard work pays off. I lived through your pictures all weekend. Thank you both.

Kali....Grant.....

You make me so proud. You are starting your new job this week. Fretful you'll be.

Don't forget how strong you are. It's built into your roots. It's your core.

Keep your head up when things get wonky, you'll get through I promise.

Put your ethics to work, and your strong communication skills out there. Go chase what you deserve.

And yes, traffic will suck. But that's life in Southern Cali.

If you pray, please pray for Kris. We're headed back to Sunset Oncology today at 4:00pm (don't be jealous you Hollywood 101 fwy lovers). He's down with yet another gnarly virus. No vaccinations will be given that he needs so bad. Per moms discretion.

But at least we'll talk the talk with the docs. Discussing the unexplained continued severe knee pain.
His new girlfriend surprised him with a cruise for his birthday (sadly the minute I saw the card, my tummy dropped -hey there germvillecruiseship-his-mom-is-a-freak-party-pooper)

This afternoon hopefully we'll discuss ongoing issues. He can't do labs because he's sick, so he'll do them at the end of the week. Per his moms request.

Med plans, (I want to so badly wean him from some of his immune suppressant meds)- Is there options to come off chemo- (he's nauseated all day every day).
Such a double edged sword. One makes his scleraderma feel better, but takes all his immunity away.
Twenty nine year old man, doesn't deserve this.
None of us do.

Corey, if you're reading this- DON'T you worry honey, he's gonna be in your wedding this weekend even if I have to put on those wrangler jeans, cowboy hat and do it for him! HA!

This life.

Hope you're all pushing through.

Pray that you stay healthy and able.

To see things next year.

That's always the grandest hope.