Peace & Love: Keeping My Heart Safe.

-----------POST ORIGINALLY DRAFTED ON Oct 18th----------adding to it weeks later. LOL

Safe and sound.

With lots of peace. And moments.

Moments that only I can make for me. For us. For my family. Because we know how the story goes-

"When Mama's happy, everybody's happy"-

Can I get an Amen?

Amen.

This past weekend Bill and I snuck away.

To a place that holds a very peaceful part of my heart. It also holds a place that lets loose, and lets Lisa be Lisa. A place that lets us let our hair down, and hug a little tighter. You know those slivers of time where you can look at your partner and smile across the room as you wake up with ease. In our home the routine goes a little like this....Bill wakes at the crack o' dawn. Slips out of bed and into the closet for a quiet exit hoping that mama is still sleeping. Lisa wakes shortly after making her way into the kitchen in search of him. Coffee is most always made. And we join one another somewhere in between the living room, or outside lounge chairs. Anywhere to clear the sleepy webs from our eyes. When out of town, we are most always grateful for just being away....

I haven't been able to sleep. For MONTHS. Even in my most peaceful place. I toss and turn all night. Really though, I think I can blame hormones for this nonsense. But never-the-less....it sucks.

His hugs in the early mornings, and morning sits and chats certainly help sort it all.

This past weekend another interesting change of events happened.

I didn't go to the car show.

First time in I-don't-know-how-many-years, I somehow walked through the days away FULL of peace.

And when someone asks me what my source of peace looks like, it's generally decorating, cleaning, organizing, and sorting while listening to my favorite music. Classical. I get eye rolls when it's on if Bill's home trying to work on the boat and mozart is playing. LOL

Thursday morning we jetted out at 5:30am. Down the road we went, to a new diner (to me). The start of what I would say was "all the little change I needed".

We arrived around 1pm. Unloading the two thousand bags I seem to pack- (but, listen kids...I left several bags there...no need to roll them eyes-LOL) I had thee cutest pumpkin in all the land, and I had the arsenal of nothing but cornucopia, fall deco, peace, love and clean blow dried hair (pick your happiness kids, that's mine-there's something about that dry desert air and hair-right Jaymee?)

We managed to share the lake with hardly anyone. Well, except my aunt and uncle. {insert heart emoji's}

Such a sweet day on Friday. A day where we'd leave behind all the stresses. The breakfast we shared along the waterside that morning, turned into jumping in the boat and blazing across to the otherside for lunch.

And so the remainder of my weekend was filled with just sweet goodness.

For me. For us.

A quiet, still house. Just the two of us.

The kids sending their tokens of love via le'phones, filling my heart each time to the very top....


AXU- Sorority Sisters for life. Oct 2016

Reality kicked back in a few days later when that phone call came in. Fever.

Friday we'd rally back to our Hollywood stomping grounds. Listening to the words "Negative" for his Philadelphia Chromosome. Something we pray will stay at bay forever and ever. Amen.

All week I had reached out to my buddies for prayer. In fear of all the silly things I still ponder.

Daily.

You know we still rally with labs. With med changes and the little things that "pop" up along this path.

Sometimes, to some people it seems like no big deal. However...when it's your child, I still push. I still question. I still question it all. Every single bit of it. And this doctor right here is my team member. She listens to me. She whole-heartedly loves Kris. Game plan includes some more labs. He's got a referral to Dermatology for some skin lesions that feel weird (remember all the radiation he had). She does whatever it is we request. He goes for another Bone Marrow Biopsy in Jan. (She said she'd have Dr. Farol do this round because she hurt him so bad last time).

The thing about these journey's is you get three steps ahead, and you praise with your hands in the air. And then you slowly slip back into the grind of life, and little bumps.

Like this week his "cold" and med changes created this-

And what looks like just some sore lips, actually mean the anti-viral meds they weaned him on during the fever and hospital visit created this. And what I mean by this, is his cells, and his immune system is so brand new it doesn't fight ANYTHING off. On Monday as he tried to run normal errands that normal people want and need to run, like banking, so his account isn't overdrawn. And to the car dealership because something is dragging underneath. And to his hat and shirt place to keep his side business alive...

He stopped by my office. I'd begin my messages to his doctor.

The thing about the medical protocol and community is you must be the squeaky wheel. And as my Dad taught me as a young girl. If the answer you are looking for isn't clear, or you aren't made clear, you must keep asking. So after two hours within leaving a message via email to her-I called. Most times the nurses are kind. I mean, they have to be. But sometimes (they're dealing with me...) they seem soo busy. I mentioned to that particular nurse his meds need to be adjusted, with my whole heart believing he needed to be back on Acyclovir right away, and one more antibiotic.

His doctor called him back within 15minutes. Funny how that works right?

And guess what? He's back on Acyclovir. lol
Holding Gleevec and Bactrim a little longer as his WBC recovers just a tad more.

I am telling you all, especially you followers in this journey. NEVER. EVER. EVER, stop asking.

Your loved one relies on YOU to help THEM. Mom's become momcologists', and Dad become the same.

Your wife, daughter, son, sister, husband...whomever...they NEED YOU.

Never stop trying to learn, and NEVER ever stop asking. You will need to push for answers. Follow your gut.

Last night we celebrated Tori's 21st Birthday. A gathering of our family. Kali driving back from school to surprise Tori. Our Auntie Lyn there to support the love as always.. And she was armed with pictures. Pictures from years ago.

Those pictures that make you go, woah.