Moments On The Water

Part of Kris' journey included lots of reminders of "getting back out on the water".
{followed up with lots of nagging, because duh, his mom is lisa}

Part of those reminders also included lots of reassuring.  You know the drill, Every little thing is gonna be alright".  We'd all preach to him that one day he'd look back on the darkest days as moments in time. Those moments none of us want to look back on. I can remember my girlfriends praying for, and with me, and I'd deep down inside I wondered if they truly knew what I was feeling.  A feeling I wouldn't wish on any enemy. 

And yet they'd rally.  Lighting candles in my soul.  Helping me get through.

Humanity.  Love.  Isn't such true in life?  We all need one another to just get through life.  Through trials and tribulations.  One day life seems to be grooving right along, then the next, boom. Shit thrown so deep into your face you wonder if you'll ever get it all off.  And yet, humanity steps in.  Friends.  Family.  Love and nurturing.  The fact that we all have friends and family that stand by to toss us that life line.
Humanity.

Yesterday I was searching for a work related email.  From our UPS rep.  What I found was not from her but some how it linked me to an update to family and friends.  The first day at City Of  Hope.  

Instead of stopping in my silly tracks, and moving away from it.  I read the first few paragraphs. Reeling back in my seat, but continued to read.

The first day of radiation.  And something about Bill sitting on one side as I sat on the other, answering nurses questions, and a phone that kept ringing. A day I wish to erase from every inch of my body, heart and soul. 

I wonder if people can go somewhere that will erase such horrid memories. It truly makes me want to poop.

But again, this is life, right?  And I'm certainly not the only one in this big ocean of "life".

Life.

Stop reading Lisa, stop. Stop reading, let it go.

I thought - FUCK.

Don't get me wrong, I pray and I pray hard. I have such a beautiful relationship with Jesus.  I pray daily for his answers. 

He's with me, you guys. 

Right now, life seems good. For my boy, for Jen, for Kali and for us. 

 Life.

A new life.

I sat next to Kris and Jen last night at Fish Camp and across the table from Jeff, Renee and Bill, soaking up the last summer-time vibes...you know..... good wine, good food, while smiling across the table at one another. Her parents, his parents....them. Us.

Life.

Love.

My bird.

He takes lots and lots of pictures.  So many that at times it takes him weeks to sort through.  Partly due to living life. *Hallelujah-MY FINGERS WIGGLING IN THE AIR* From all the new moments back on the water, to the moments watching his beautiful sweet cupcake Jenny shop, or try on pretty dresses in a dress store.  Little things the two of them do now without taking a moment in time for granted. Dogs get to the park every single day.  They'll ride bikes to dinner, or cruise to his favorite place to grub.  

He sent me a selfie sitting in Charlotte Russe, a dress shop in the mall as she tried on dresses for my cousins wedding next week.  My reply..."You're awesome"-

He truly is. 

Each time he and I get to an appointment together it's a little treat to sit next to him while he scrolls through his computer or phone. I'm captivated by his photos. 

He caught this picture a few weeks back.  A tuna boat.  Although it's a rich mans way of gathering too much too quick, it made me think. "Gathering"

Whatever it may be.

Seems to me, this is life.  

Trying to gather things.  This and that, here and there.

The one thing that stands out to me is how important it is to gather love. 

And humanity.

For one another.

I have a girlfriend that kind of walks to the same beat as me{hey E}. We move along, clam up, move along, push love, give love, clam up, move along. 

It's the pattern us humans know all too well.

Life.

Trying hard to scoop up the things that matter the most.
Love. Humanity. Smiles. Kindness.

Our way of inching through trials and tribulations, whatever it may be, and coming out of the corner, inch by inch. One toe in front of the other. Trying to find a way.

Gathering.

Even if we want one big scoop. Try to value the hope of love in this hard life.
Be thankful for what is in front.
For the moments that are good, even when you've been through hard, or bad.
That whiplash in your heart won't last forever.

Keep gathering.  Love.

Spread humanity.  And smiles.  The world needs more people like you.

I wish you all a beautiful weekend.

Even if it's gathering small tokens of love.
Or better yet, handing them out.
It's free.
Won't cost you a thing.

And what you'll gain on the inside.

Priceless.

I hope you feel safe, and I hope you feel loved.

xo

Love,

This Mama Lisa

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUNTIE CECE!  May your beautiful red stained lips, with the perfect lipstick treat those around you today with nothing but smiles....may peace be with you....

Kali, be safe and have a great time in Big Bear! AXO Retreats for the win! xoxo