Peace & Love: Holiday Reset Buttons.

First of all, I want to say "Thank you"---

Thank you to each and every friend that reached your arms out to hug me last week. Whether it was a chat with my son, or a hug around my shoulders. Little distractions along the way with texts' coming in from so and so... I can always rely on my friends and family for that. I took one call from a long time friend we haven't seen in forever, and his words were so warm. So full of hope. Even though I started to cry mid-sentence he just picked up the pieces over the phone and kept it moving.

Compassion.

Last week, and the week before that was a doozy for me.

For Kris.

At one point, I thought I was losing my mind, but then quickly reminded myself, I am strong enough to pull through this moment in time. These pages in yet another chapter.

Finding answers I need to for healing. For jacked up doctors that treated him and me like we were creatures in a forest. Leaving my legacy of "TAKE NO SHIT IN HEALTHCARE"

Trust me, that doctor will never forget who I am. (A covering doctor in LB, was a complete asshole)

I am a warrior mom. For my warrior son.

But we made it through.

14 days of grit. Of bronchitis.

Of fever. Body aches. Chills.

Vomit.

Tears.

Frustration.

Emails.

Calls.

Yet again. If we've walked across gravel barefoot, we most certainly can again....

The experience of change still happens whether we want it to or not.

As is true in this life, right? Change. Forward. Backward. And forward again.

Part of my week would be considered loony if you ask me.

One morning I ordered a coffee at the Starbucks counter in Vons, to soon walk away gathering a few groceries I needed, realizing I had left that coffee up at the counter. (After filling my little cart...The look on the young girls face as I went back...lolz)

A true testament of "you never know what someone is dealing with"-

#thatzombielife.

Kris is feeling much better. He still climbs tall mountains every single day. His body trying to get back in the groove. Trying to grow into a new man. Weak in every way.

This morning we spoke about Jeff (Jens dad whom he grew very very close to), and how it still impacts him. He shed tears, which don't really come so easy for him. He surely misses him.

Barcelona Spain November 2017

We received this post card from Kali last night.

Her sweet words to us. For a minute in time, I reflected on how far we've all come. In between the amazing Christmas cards we've received, it was that moment of gratitude that came from our littlest. Sending a love note to her mom from across the world. A season of her life changing. A semester abroad coming to an end. The timing of that post card rollin' in just after a storm. A storm in her moms heart. A body so exhausted from her week prior manic mode.

The exhale.

Keeping boundaries in check. Saying no to things that are toxic to me. Most especially humans that are toxic. Things I have no control of.

To keep my circle close, and narrow. To stay slow and present for the important things. To limit things I need to.

Small steps forward.

Taking care of those I need to.

When I need to.

Barcelona Spain November 2017

To celebrate Christmas the way it should be celebrated. With simple ways to love.

Food. Music. Moments.

New recipes.

New friends.

New plans.

New changes.

Hopefully forward. More moments moving forward, healing, spiritual, and emotional.

Forward.

Bring it on in Kali.....May your flight be filled with healthy people and wide seats....xo

Dropped the news to Kris and Kali today that I will quarantine Kali when she arrives back....

Proceed At Your Own Risk with visits.....LOL! Sorry, not sorry, but those long plane trips sling some crazy shiz. #justspeakingthetruth.

Also side note to any of you transplant friends- Hang tight...I know it's easy to think it will stay hard forever, but you'll get some fresh air in between. Just push on through. I know easier said than done...Tighten that seat belt a little bit more. If someone offers help. And compassion. And an ear. Take it. The energy will come back to you and because of your suffering you will be so good at noticing the small cries for help in the future.