Exhale. Breathe. Love.

Friday.

A very long week behind me.

A busy one.

A testy one.

A happy one.

A sad one.

A loving one.

A birthday dinner with my besties.

A melt down one.

A laugh so hard I cried one.

A hover one.

A healing one.

A tell someone off in a UPS store one.

A organized one.

A chaotic one.

A water the lawn questioning life one.

A lucky one.

I am alive.

My babies are alive.

My best friend and lover is alive.

And we are so lucky.

To be healthy. To be able. To be strong enough.

Should be enough, right?

Right.

Happy weekend friends.

Make it a good one.  

Get up and make a difference.

Even if it's just smiling at strangers through all the chaos.

Full moon peekin atchu!

Lisa Lynn

Adjust Those Sails

What is it about coming home from time off with the feeling of wanting more rest time....

This is how my body and mind feels....

And yes, this is our Grand-Doggo "Buck" who couldn't hang with the BIG DOGS and so Grammie bailed him outta of the mayhem at the river..(loud boats, louder music)--

I'm hoping to adjust my sails this week with some blog time, and most of all, the realization that staying focused and working our tails off is just part of the game.

In it to win it, right?

Or is it, swimming to survive?

I hope you all had a great last week, and weekend.  Mine was full of rest, reading, laughing, sipping, catching up with family, and sitting next to my best friend.

I wish I coulda/woulda slept in a little longer. 

Chat soon you little farters.

This Mama Lisa

Another Year Floating Around The Sun

Today is my forty eighth birthday.

 Aries.

I was born at 4 in the morning.

To parents that didn't name me for 3 days.

No real fault or harm, after all, I wasn't in the plans for my parents.

Created 9 months after my sister was born.

She wasn't in their young plans either. 

I was also not breastfed because that's not what they did in the 70's (so I'm told)

I was a very independent little human.

Smiling the minute I woke, and talking until I fell asleep.

Learning things on my own, often trying to teach my sister.

An Aries they say. 

I was a dreamer.

Still am.

I'm feisty when pushed.

A true lover at heart.

A take no bullshit type of girl, yet will wrap every bit of my heart around those in need.

Animals and elderly on my top priority.

I work hard every single day.

My biggest achievement is raising two humans.  To be good humans.

Every year my birdies ask "Whatcha want for your birthday mama?"

The same thought rolls through my head.

I wish for good health, my babies healthy, safe, and at peace at where they are right now.

I wish that those around me suffering could have pieces of their souls stained with goodness.

Or at least moments of "This will pass"

I don't really need anything-

Of course there's those moments when I remember "ohh that cool new flat iron, or a big new curling iron".

If someone cut me loose in Marshalls, Home Goods, or Ross for an afternoon....

I search back at pictures, like this one walking into a new year 2013...not knowing what would unfold.

My wish for myself is compassion. 

More forgiveness.

More patience (I totally lack patience) Bill is nodding his head as he reads this some day.

I wish for peace around my family.

I'm not the blow your candles out, sing to me type, but I truly love and appreciate any prayer, good wish, or positive thoughts sent my way.

Especially the notes from my parents. 

My mom especially. 

She found it hard to compliment me as a child, and yet as an adult, she praises me in text messages alot.

My dad is more of my anchor.  

Sending me the positive love and good thoughts more than ever.

Many times I wish I could sit across from them on my birthday and just hear more childhood stories.

About me.

Today on my birthday I am enclosed in a home we work so hard for.  Next to a man that is my best friend.  My confidant.  My understanding human to not sing to me on my birthday.  To serve me a good margarita.  And perhaps take me out for a good dinner. The one that understands my need for complete quiet.  Also the one that gets me when I blast the stereo to my favorite jam.

Today we are listening to my favorite Italian Classical throughout the house (not his very favorite) but mine.  And I work while candles burn.  A view to make you sit back down and just reminisce about what you work for.  Neighborly waves, then tucking back inside for peace.  And quiet. 

We wake early and sometimes toss and turn all night.  But we know we have eachother.

We know what the other is worried about.  In turn, always giving away hugs to help the moment pass.

This year, and for hopefully many more, I pray that I am able to love others. And to continue a path of kindness.  Of understanding.  Not in search of a perfect life, because those don't exist.  But for harmony of healing, and puzzle pieces making sense in our journey of hard work. 

I hope that by example of nurturing those in sickness, or troubled health, that I am strong enough to help make a difference.

I hope that we can get away more for times of solitude.

I hope to be able to catch more sunsets in this life.  Sharing the view with people I love.

I hope I don't wear shirts that show my bra like this

I hope I learn the lessons of 3 martini's.  Because 3 bite hard the next day.  Lisa should stay at a 2 max. 

I hope I can dance when a good song comes on.

I hope I remember to not wear this pink trucker hat again.

Woah.  Woah. Woah.  That jacket Kali....

Forty Eight Years of floating around the sun.  Floating in and out of good times, and bad.  Remembering in the tough times that they don't last.  

I am surely soaking up some rest.  My good book.  Sunsets, wind, sunshine and good drinks.

Happy Birthday to me.

All my love, and the biggest cup of PEACE to you.

Remember, things pass, but the feeling of LOVE always stays in us forever.

Keep spreading smiles.  And compliments.  This world needs you.  And them. 

To Kris and Kali....I love you.  I am grateful to have your love. The only place I'll love you more is in Heaven someday. 

This Mama Lisa Lynn.  

Birthstone : Diamond

Element: Fire

Color: Red

This Day: Tuesday

This is so funny to me:

Strengths: Courageous, determined, confident, enthusiastic, optimistic, honest, passionate

Weaknesses: Impatient, moody, short-tempered, impulsive, aggressive

Aries likes: Comfortable clothes, taking on leadership roles, physical challenges, individual sports

Aries dislikes: Inactivity, delays, work that does not use one's talents

One Of My Favorites

I've always loved this quote. 

It's one that I try to live by.

Not always easy, because anger and frustration can easily step in the way....

May you all have solitude, peace and most of all, love.

Ever yours, 

Lisa Lynn

What To Say

Have you ever watched a good friend or family member walk through a shit storm and you instantly try to figure out what to do.  

For me, I try to figure out what to say. 

Sometimes words are really just words.  Humans quickly grab all the common expressions to "try" to help. With all good intentions, we just do. When you're facing a crisis, it's hard to really absorb what others are trying to say.  Their expressions mean well, but the way we accept it, is totally different.

For instance, when we were in the thick of watching our bird fight for his life, I would literally cringe when someone would text me  "How's Kris"-  If I'm being very honest here, it fucking bugged me. 

AND, it wasn't their fault!

The answer was so wide open.  To me, it felt like a cut that was so far from healing. So the answer to that text was just salty.  

Most times I would reply, out of sheer respect, but then would soon bark at people.  To this day, I put my phone on my shoe holder in the living room where it charges.  I know Bill is covering the alarm at the shop. I take the risk that one of my babies can't get ahold of me.  But the rumble of a text at midnight, or 10pm, just irritates me if it's a non-urgent text from anyone.  I just don't like it. 

One of my best friends, someone I share so much with.  Someone I watched navigate through the same sports events, high school stuff, travels and parties with. Nurturing our kids as they grow.   

They're walking through shit, with no shoes. 

Just broken dignity.  And hope. And a very brave face. 

And I don't know what to do. 

I don't know what to say.

I just say to everyone facing things in this life that have crumbled from a crisis, that you WILL get through.  

The effects will inevitably linger for longer than we'll ever want. Or deserve. 

The newness of it will wear. 

The sharp shock will wear. 

The people and tribe will go back into their lives.

The situation will become alot less brutal.

And you will get through. 

They always say, in sickness and in health.  And we all know that bullshit happens in every single family.  

But what do you do to help those you care about in crisis mode. 

Love?

Wait?

Listen?

Praying is always the simple answer for many.

For me, I say.....keep on going.  KEEP. ON. GOING. 

And I am here.  

Even though I don't know what to say.  Or do. 

Read this about "Happiness"

I actually attack the concept of happiness. The idea that—I don’t mind people being happy—but the idea that everything we do is part of the pursuit of happiness seems to me a really dangerous idea and has led to a contemporary disease in Western society, which is fear of sadness. It’s a really odd thing that we’re now seeing people saying “write down three things that made you happy today before you go to sleep” and “cheer up” and “happiness is our birthright” and so on. We’re kind of teaching our kids that happiness is the default position. It’s rubbish. Wholeness is what we ought to be striving for and part of that is sadness, disappointment, frustration, failure; all of those things which make us who we are. Happiness and victory and fulfillment are nice little things that also happen to us, but they don’t teach us much. Everyone says we grow through pain and then as soon as they experience pain they say, “Quick! Move on! Cheer up!” I’d like just for a year to have a moratorium on the word “happiness” and to replace it with the word “wholeness.” Ask yourself, “Is this contributing to my wholeness?” and if you’re having a bad day, it is.

—Hugh MacKay, author of The Good Life

And a little bit of silly, because if you know me, it's how I get through.

Chin up.

No one told us this life would be perfect. 

Or even close. 

All my wishes for wholeness to you,

Lisa Lynn

PS:  Good luck Kali-- as you embark on a new job this afternoon!  A new title.  A new paycheck that will cover your expensive makeup.  A new paycheck that will buy you those cute outfits at Stitch-n-Feather, a new paycheck for all the cute little accessories and pedicures you need.  lol
You know mama is silly, but so so sooooo stoked you're moving money mountains now. booom.

I am so proud of you!

Truth

I read a quote this morning....

"Each day when you wake up you have a decision to make. 

Will you give up.  Or give in.  Or give it your all."

This truly resonated with me.  Deep. 

I offer this quote to many of you today.

 I love you.  So much. 

Keep driving your heart towards what you want.

What you need.

What will help YOU.

And trust yourself. 

This life is just too precious. 

Tell those you love, you do.

All my love,

Lisa Lynn

Changes. Heartbreak. Crisis. Learning. Loving. Looking Back. Growing. Looking Forward.

I received a text from Kali yesterday.  Not the normal text filled with silly and light.  It was filled with anxiousness and the firm feelings of "change"-  A change-is-a-coming kids.  Graduation.  Careers. Jobs. Schedules. Dreams. Fear. 

It's really all about CHANGE. 

The one thing I've learned in parenthood is, things start to happen with reason.  Meaning, some way and some how you just learn to step back.  

The moments when they're learning to walk, and you're watching and praising, and yet so excited as they take step by step.  

The moments when they're making decisions in elementary, middle and high school. Rolling their eyes so deep back into their head because THEY THINK THEY KNOW EVERYTHING IN THAT MOMENT... as we roll our eyes way back into OUR heads. 

And so the shift is happening.  An almost 22 year old.  Graduating.  With a Deans List recognition. 

Traveled and studied abroad.  Leaned in towards us for advice, money, guidance, paperwork, signatures, reprimanding if the time called, saying no at times, and most always sharing "yes's" because she worked so hard so many times for those yes's.  

Change.

Fear. 

Learning.

Mostly, growing up. 

G.R.O.W.I.N.G-U.P.

And so the mama bird backs up a little. She watches her make big girl decisions.  Starting a new job this weekend. One that is filled with very long hours.  One that is starting at the bottom.  

One that will make her want to break, and yet I pray she doesn't.  

One that will make her want to question it all.

And yet, I will just remind her. 

She's got this. 

Growing up.

And Change.  

This is life, my sweet dear.  And it's truly only YOU that will make YOUR life the best.

Don't look back little one.

You've been so so lucky to get to this point.

Traveling the world. 

Living. 

Loving. 

And mostly, being educated. 

YOUR EDUCATION CAN NEVER BE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU- 

That's most beautiful.

I love you little one. 

And I'm only standing a little further back.

You'll be fine.

I promise. 

I truly truly promise.

Believe in yourself. 

  

 Freshman Year In The Dorms. 

We've worked so hard to provide in love and spirit.  Always always encouraging you. 

Hopefully showing and giving you the strength to take on this big world. 

Kali and Mads saying goodbye- Freshman year 

Someway, and some how....you just get through.

This life can be so twisted.  So confusing.  So gut wrenching hard.  And yet, you lean into those that will carry you across. 

Over rivers you'd never think to cross.

And  you just do. 

Hold tight to your tribe.

You are not alone.

I love you all.

Heavy week. Heavy weekend.

Keeping LOVE first. 

This Mama Lisa