With a heavy heart.

And many, many tears.  We said goodbye.

Shirley,  you will be missed.  By all of us. 

We have so much of you in our hearts.

To any of our friends and or family that would like to reach out to Bill-
LOVE paves the way.


May peace be with you.

Leese

When they pull together before they fly away....

The original girlfriends that have held close throughout elementary, middle and high school are holding on to every little moment before they all stretch their arms out in this big life.

College. 

Some groups jetted off to Hawaii- eh em Gianni....ha.

Others venture over to a mountainside home by the ocean side.  Thank you Maria's brother Richie-

Dinners were planned.

Horseback riding was planned.

Floating in the pool was planned.

I spy red cups. 

I  hope they enjoyed every single minute.  They've worked for it....all twelve of them. boom

 It's cute to see Kali's perspective of shots to send Mom. 

I casually checked the menu for an idea of what to exp$ct on this adventure.  Each meal weighing in at a simple sixty bones.  ha.  

I receive this, and can only think....hmmm sure looks like Shelly and I. boom. HA!


Happy sweet blessing to you all.

We are holding tight to the moments we have with Shirley.  We hear many different stories.  We hear words of encouragement, and words of love.  We hear words of how to's and where to's.  But the one thing we hold onto in room two thirty six, is her.  Her face.  Her hair, her hands.  All of it. We watch every move on every nurses hands. Their facial expressions.  The buttons they push, their every movement around her bed.
The way she scrunches her face.  And moves her head.  All of it.  We wonder. We beg for her to answer us back.  We caress her face, and her feet. We're told to keep those to a minimum.  But that's hard. She's a Mom.  She's a Grandma.  She's a fighter.  She's ours.  And we aren't ready to let her go.  Not yet.
Medicine.  Machines.  Life. And hope. 
I can only sit and wonder.  Wonder what everyone is truly feeling.  Especially her.

Hope. 

Today I continue to hope for peace.  In all of this.

One thing I know for sure- She has a tribal following in her children.  That's one thing we can hope for in this life.  To be so surrounded and advocated for during the darkest hours.  From our children.  

Have a nice weekend friends.

Call a loved one.  Celebrate this life, because we have one shot. 

Love and peace,

Billy, I love you, and I will forever and ever be your little rock. Stay strong. xo

Lisa

When the air is thick.

-Hope is the little voice you hear whisper "maybe" when it seems the rest of the world is shouting "no"-


We are holding onto hope today.  And tomorrow.

My troubles seem to fade when I look at the big picture of this life.


Pray for our Shirley.  Today her baby birdies will sit with her team of doctors.  Prepared will never be an easy word. 

Hope might be the right word.


Love and peace to you all,

Leese

Slices of a weekend.

Kids in the harbor can be very creative.  Especially when it comes to the bridges, and bayside sand.
When we came across this, I could only chuckle, and be extremely grateful that my boy has passed this "phase"- So here we have a ramp, that shoots them directly into the water.  The ladder is priceless, only because the sandy beach is a 10 feet from there.  And the guy in the tree?  hmmm.  what's up partner.

 And soon we'd see this.  Bum. Bum. Bummmmm.  HAHAHA!

I'm quite sure negotiations were at their finest.  

I mean, they had a solid life guard.  So....

Onward we'd move.  Catching this sticker KMS.  My birdies initials. boom. 

And while this side of the harbor was filled with canoes, kayaks and paddle boarders, we see more of these fellers. 

 But no worry kids.  They're hard at work. 

When you see it.  Front in center baby, front in center. 

I do believe I see his cell phone out, and I definitely watched him snap some shots.   #taxdollas.   

Meanwhile our boy was out in the San Diego/Mexico waters getting his dive on.

His latest and greatest hobby.  Spearfishing, and diving.


Happy Monday people.

Happy Monday.

Lisa

ps.  Update on Grandma Shirley, we are told to take it week by week, vs. day by day.  Prayers.  Faith.

Holding.

Mama Shirley. Grandma Shirley. 

She's tough.

She's kind.

Her gentle loving soul, always yearning for happiness, between all. 

She'll stand up when she needs to.

And she'll sit right back down if she wants to. 

She'll love her babies and grand babies til the sun goes down. 

She's walked some pretty long hard health related roads.  And she always prevails.

She always prevails. 

She will smile during the most painful days. And step out of her cozy bed on her most tired days. Always, and only for us.  For her grandbabies.  For a dinner planned, or a game in another city.  She'll get up and go.

The last few weeks have been tough.

She's been in the hospital very sick.  This week. 

Very sick. 

She's fighting.

Her kids have built a fort of love around her.

Sharing moments, time, and discussion.  How to get her better.  How to climb this mountain.  How to take care of Dad, and yet cover Mom with all the well wishes she needs right now.

My blog will become a little sparse right now as I bow out respectfully.  To be perfectly honest, I've always kept my blog pretty real, (except not always posting my ugly pictures, and at times maybe painting a prettier picture of us as a family...but) Out of respect, I will share when and where I can. This mountain top in front  is high, but not that high.
I have faith.



Right now, we need all the positive energy out there.  Prayers.  Good vibes.  Mojo's. Whatever you want to call it, we need it.


Grandma Shirley, fight on.....fight on Grandma Shirley.



Hug your family.  Don't forget to tell them how you love them. Even during the dark days.

I stood in amazement this morning as I watched a lady lose it in Starbucks because her latte wasn't prepared just right.  I mean, really.  It certainly put the word perspective in it's place.  If she only knew.  If she only knew what a freak she sounded like.  

Love is love.  Family is family.  Pain is pain.  And illness gets real, very fast.

Right now, we're holding.  Holding onto Faith. Hope.  And lots of Love. 

May peace be with you,

Leese


ps.  Kyoko, thank you for the sweet words the other night.  Those unexpected pieces of love could not have come at a better time.

Things that stuck with me.

During the graduation week gala, there are several things that stuck with me.

Picking up my folks from the airport, on a breezy beautiful day in June, was magical. 

 I mean.  Seriously.  Landing here for lunch on Seal Beach-Main St. together.  Magical.

Rolling into Chris-n-Pitt's a mere 4 hours later, we were stuffed, yet giddy from the love surrounding this visit.  All together.....reminiscing of our many meals shared there as young kids.  The shrimp, the halibut that is now off the menu.  Many things have changed.  Isn't this just true in life?  Everything changes. But these moments, magical.

Graduation morning, as I woke up realizing the day I had planned for so many years, fell upon me like another day. It was so peaceful.  We enjoyed a quiet lunch together. Just Kali and I.  I knew what was ahead of us.
Trying to plan out where to eat with such a large amount of people.  So I sat back...many times taking a huge deep breath.  Reminding myself, that the long lines.  The traffic to get to and from, the gap in moments to take it all in, was meant to be.  To take it in.  The chaos to get in was exactly what was expected. Getting scanned one by one.  People cutting, while others lost their cool.  Sweat dripping down our backs, while frazzled energy pushed the crowd forward.  Many toting flowers, lei's, cards, and chair pads.  Trying to keep it magical.  Reminding my sister at times, that we'd move through this just like anything, and tomorrow would come sooner than we'd want it to.

 To see my Dad in the crowd was probably the best feeling of all.

As we watched the crowd become settled.  The graduation music and ceremony set to start, when we finally spotted this girl.  I wrote her a note during the day, placing it on her bed.  Begging her to really soak up the moments. Keep the little bits of magic.....magic. 

 I couldn't help but grin each time I would turn my head this way.  My Dad.

Beach balls, blown up naughty dolls, balls filled with plastic wieners keeping it just a tad bit weird. So spicy and so funny.  A much needed laughter in this crowd. Seriously.

First Grandson.

And that's a wrap.  Popped beach balls and all. 

Proud.  So proud.  Magical.

I love this picture.....

This one too.

Okay, these too. 

"They did it"

As explained earlier when both daughters/granddaughters/nieces/cousins- graduate...the scramble of "where to eat"- became just a tad bit boggling.  Not to mention, Kali and Gio just wanted to be together.  And if you know the way we work, we just go with what makes our girl/Gio happy.  So smooshing into the Castillo's plans would be the best plan.  I promised myself on the very first day of June, that I would NOT stress over these little details.  I just wouldn't.  We will celebrate Kali's next venture next month. 

Celebratory shot with Mama B.  Because why not.  A few times, I'd lean back and catch eye contact with our girl, and boy (Gio) and a complete smile would beam up on their face.  This is what they wanted.  Both Dads adorn the table ends, and their family tucked in the middle.  Grad night would start within 2 hours- From 10pm-5am- xo

My mama and her mama.  The home that has never changed for me. Ever.  Sorry Grandma for posting this one.  But you two little lovelies refuse pictures, and well.....

I would bet to say, the last time we stood together in my Grandma's kitchen side by side would be well over 30 years ago.   This picture? Magical.

Sister+Grandma's backyard.  Sweet.

Dad and uncle

Our birdies. Chapter Eighteen.

I spy....pepper in her tooth.

Beauty.

Hey world, meet "Susie".  Rescued by Jeff from a shelter.  Her third and final home. 

Some of our tribe.

Too much going on.

As Friday would soon wrap up, we all went our separate ways.  Me to the beach side to snuggle with my lover to catch the Kings game.  (bad-ass, by the way)-
Watching the game, watching birds, and watching a fire glisten away.

Too much a coward to deal with my parents leaving the next day.

 And so I sat here.  Next to what makes me most comfortable.  Bill, you have and will forever be my rock.

Our daughter graduated.  Our niece graduated.  Gianni graduated. They made it through the grad night party.  I held, and hugged my parents.  I had moments with family at my grandma's house that was beyond magical.  I laughed alot. The one thing that I pulled away from, was "goodbye"-

Saturday morning I would wake knowing that was it.  They'd be out of here, and back to their mountain. 

The memories are tucked away like magic in me.  

I am thankful.

I am proud. 

The things that stuck with me were the simple things. 

Magical moments with family and friends.  In this life. 

 

We're pretty lucky if you ask me.

Happy Monday Mama's and Papa's.


xo

Love and best wishes to you all,

Leese